Your body is the least interesting thing about you

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Yes I wrote the world orange 100 times. Did you skim over it? See an overly reptitive and relatively unremarkable blob of text and just jump it, Down to the writing where something was new and interesting? Or did you read it for a little, hear the word too many times in your head, get confused and “oh well she just wrote orange a hole lot” (is she insane?) then moved on with that assumption. Either way, (if I’m insane or not) you probably would’ve missed the one word that’s different. (yay she had a reason, she’s not insane!) and once, I wrote orange as “oronge”. (woah go me!)

My point, I wrote orange so many times that either, it became nothing more than a blob of letters, not a fruit or a colour, Or “orange” appeared 100 times, but you only acknowledged it’s first few appearances, and the rest of it was forgotten, we assume it’s purpose and glaze anything else over because it’s too conceited to become overly concerned with. In any way, we saw orange too many times, that it lost its meaning.

A word lost its meaning when we said it or when we saw it, too often. And if it happens to a word, a collection of letters that yes, holds meaning but has no sentience or knowledge of its meaning, does it not make sense, that if we look at ourselves too frequently, or too long, incessantly inspecting our bodies and reflections, to understand who we are through how we present, that we as complex, conscious and purposeful beings could begin to lose sight of our own meaning. That in looking longer, trying to see more, we push further away from the complexity of who we are and instead begin to embrace appearance as identity?

But if we strip back our outer layers, beneath skin muscle and bone, taking ego and vanity out of the equation, your body and what you look like is the least interesting thing about you.

Anyone can see you. Anyone, with enough exposure can learn and remember your shape, the colour of your hair and eyes, how tan you are, but not everyone can know you. Yes they may see a smile, the glossiness of your hair, your abs, perfectly long eyelashes, a flat stomach. They see a version of you, the necessary details to describe you to a sketch artist but they could not capture you in close enough detail to paint your portrait.

The people you cross paths with don’t know your favourite colour, they don’t know the way you take your tea, what side of the bed you sleep on, how you bite your lip when you’re thinking, or your nails when your nervous, they couldn’t translate the uptick of your mouth before you laugh into a picture on a canvas. The people who know you, know those facts. The small things that maybe we don’t even notice of ourselves. They care for your hobbies, personality, passions, success, growth, they care for YOU, not your Body.

Your body does not equal personality

Your body does not equal success

Your body without your mind and thoughts and desires cannot create passion.

But the way you dress your body, the movements your body helps you to create, running, jumping, weight lifting, going to Pilates (yes that was sneaky Pilates plug but I’m an addict so I literally couldn’t not), dancing, making art, music, sewing, writing, the way you do your make up, cut style or colour your hair, is a demonstration of personality, hobbies, passions, as well as how you find success, challenge and drive.

Your body and Every Body is worthy of peace and kindness, knowing that it is both the vehicle that allows you to function and thrive but that it is also your forever home. You get one, no returns or replacements, and when you treat it right, not meaning strict and restrictive diets, intense and rigid work out routines, but when you eat enough, move mindfully, and respect your body, it allows you to do so many things. To exercise, to build muscle, to travel, to simply move your feet and take yourself anywhere you want to go.

Sadly, The fact of the matter is we are living in an incredibly toxic and polarising time where the idea of fitness and health has fused with thinness. Social media continues to push unrealised ideas and expectations of the way our bodies should look, skinny has grown more publicly idolised, Hollywood continues to shrink and largely unreaserched weightloss medications have become easily accessible without medical advice and are also being actively marketed. While people in larger bodies are faced with uninformed labels of laziness or unhealthiness. Even further in the space of social media there is an obvious entitlement of faceless viewing to judge and comment on someone based not on their first impression, that being the words that come from their mouth or even their perceived attitude but simply deciding how “good” a person is based on how big or small they appear. Which has to be the worst indicator I have ever heard of, and an abhorrent way to form an opinion of someone.

Alone, Skinny doesn’t make you a better, more helpful or more intelligent person. “I’m so sad let me call my skinniest friend to help me” said no one EVER! Being a kind, driven and caring person is what pushes you to achieve your goals, love and help those around you. Your character, actions and intention is what makes you better, helpful and intelligent, Regardless of size. Yet we all seem ingrained in a unique halo effect, a cognitive bias where our overall impression of a person is formulated on the basis of one seemingly positive characteristic, in this case thinness.

But at my thinnest I was the most unhealthy I have ever been, and probably the least helpful person to have around, because all I could think about was food and my body, no matter how thin. Yet that skinny now would be accepted, healthy at a glance. Here, again are strangers who we do not know, and do not know us. Passing judgment freely based on appearance,  but whose opinions on you, your character or worth, lack any semblance of truth.

We’re not alive to shrink ourselves until we die. We’re alive to do something bigger than ourselves. So I’m reframing the way I think about movement and my life, I’m moving to feel Good, STRONG, confident, meeting my body where it’s at, but also taking rest when I need it (not just when I’m told I should). I’m eating well to be able to power my body but also eating to socialise, share love, create connections, and if something just sounds bloody delicious at the time. I’m pursuing hobbies and trying things out of my comfort zone, challenging my perfectionism and pushing away vanity.

It doesn’t mean I’m not putting effort into my outfits, my movement, my hair, my make up, if anything I can be more creative and not so stressed about it because I’m doing it for me.

I can say all of this and I’m doing all of this, BUT ITS HARD. I do still care about my appearance probably a little too much, but I’m aware of that and I don’t know if I will ever reach a place where I truly don’t care. However, I think what’s more important is that I want to get there and I’m trying to care about everything else more.

So, fake it till you make it is how I’m moving as I would much rather know myself beyond my body, than have strangers know me from one look. Because there are so many better things to me, and to you, and we all have ambition and talent as well as beauty.

I love you all

A xx

PS to those who celebrate, I hope you all have a beautiful Easter season. Enjoy some choccie and as many hot cross bun varieties as you can find xx